The Conservative Party's Health Minister Tony Clement has recently announced that they will begin their war on drugs by targeting citizens who smoke marijuana. Tony "reefer hater" Clement said, "In the next few days, we're going to be back in the business of an anti-drug strategy." And by "back in business", he means putting the 16.8% (approximately 5.6 million people) of the Canadians who smoke marijuana in the slammer.

Taking a page out of the American's effective war on drugs campaign, the Conservative government plan on using our police forces to wage war on midnight tokers. Clement said, "We're going to be into a different world and take tackling these issues very seriously because (of) the impact on the health and safety of our kids."

According to Clement, we're entering a whole new world, one that possibly resembles The Twilight Zone. A world where calm marijuana smokers suddenly become violent and attack our children. Once attacked, these children will become zombies that will attack anyone who doesn't smoke weed. Even worse, they may develop a case of the munchies which may lead to weight gain and, in turn, lead to the destruction of planet earth.

On the surface, it may appear that the Conservative Party's war on drugs is silly and pointless, but judging by Clement's comment regarding entering the Twilight Zone it's clear that they have their eye on the big picture.

Unless we can develop a drug that prevents marijuana smokers from getting the munchies, we must consider them to be dangerous criminals and lock them up for their own good and for the good of our planet. However, aside from the munchies side effect, there's nothing wrong with marijuana so Harry Nads Headquarters fully supports the development of an after-marijuana drug.